It's Spring time!!!

"tomorrow is always fresh, with no mistakes in it" -Anne of Green Gables

What a wonderful mentality to have!  My mind is all caught up in spring these days.  I am seriously looking forward to Easter weekend and when the sun is shining, I am outside.  I can't seem to get enough!

Spring brings a new baby to our family and Zach and I are also celebrating 9 years of wedded bliss.

Our baby turns four this week, so a new baby in this family is a pretty dern big deal!  I remember when all my kids were four and under!  Now, they are four and older!  Seriously.  Weird.  I feel like I should be running around shouting, "I've been robbed!"  It has all gone by so fast!

With Easter & Spring on my mind, I have been thinking a lot about new life, fresh starts and new growth.

These three things are as real as we will let them be in our lives.  I believe with all my heart that all three of these things are possible because of Jesus Christ.  If we believe these three things are possible for us as individuals, for our spouse and for us as companionships, we would see beautiful, beautiful things and we would be happier.  I know we've all seen glimpses of it.

Spring is a great time to get married!  What advice would I give to a new couple?  What advice helped me?

For the new couple: (and for someone who wants to start again)

when Zach and I were married, we bought our first home.  there was a lot more responsibility there than we had anticipated and a lot of work to be done.  we realized that our marriage was like our yard. Beautiful things bloomed, tulips, daisy's, roses etc., without us planting them ourselves.  we were pleasantly surprised in our marriage as well, with the beautiful things that were already there for us to enjoy.

what about the rest of our yard and our marriage?  it needed to be planned.  what did we want growing?

we learned quickly that if we didn't plant anything, weeds would grow.  those weeds would often try to choke the good that was already there.

if we didn't decide to pray together at night...we wouldn't.  in that one example, are two consequences.  we didn't develop the habit of praying together, so the habit of NOT praying together was formed.  the same with a weekly date, kisses before bed, kind words, going to church, serving our neighbors, etc.  if we didn't decide what we wanted, a lot of times what we didn't want is what we got.

at the beginning of your marriage is the best time to decide what you'd like your marriage to look like in a year, five years, ten, twenty and fifty.  if you don't choose, you get what you get.  something will grow.

what about that spot in the yard that we didn't mean to neglect but we did?  sometimes we went crazy pulling up the weeds and then we still didn't plant anything there.  the weeds grew back and we had to do it again.  pulling weeds is a good thing, but it is SO much better to find something that you want to replace it with and plant that.  yes, after you plant it, sometimes those weeds try to come back, but you just get in there and maintain it and it is never as bad as it was before.  if you maintain.

marriage is so very much like that!  we are all learning.  don't expect perfection from yourself, your spouse or your marriage.  expect learning.  expect growth, expect to pull a lot of weeds.  there is nothing like sitting on your back porch, watching your children play or friends that have gathered and enjoying the beautiful environment of love and hard work that you've created together.

Fresh starts.  New beginnings.  New growth.  These are things that every couple can and should have and often.  If we can follow the advice of my good friend Anne and live that montra of "tomorrow is always fresh, with no mistakes in it", our spouse would be the luckiest spouse on the planet!

Everywhere are the signs of new life.  While you are out walking in it or working in it, I hope you will try some of these apples, to enrich the marriage you're starting or that you already have.


Apples FOR him:

* challenge him to a game of four square, hopscotch, basketball, jacks or toss something like a frisbee around.  while playing, talk to him about what he'd like to get rid of, how he'd like life to be different.  what could you pull and what could you plant?

* it's the beginning of a week, do you already know something that he'd like from you?  schedule it in your days to make sure you do it!  this could be, call the sitter and send him and invite for a date, it could be make the desert he's been asking for or would love, it could be taking a load off him by helping him with his regular responsibilities so he can rest up for a big meeting he has this week.

* just call, email, text or say something nice to their face.  be specific though.  thank you for...., i appreciate it when you...., thank you for going to work, for what you said to (child) this morning.

* be nice!  (it's only nice if he thinks it's nice!)

* laugh or find something to laugh at with them!  zach and I found THIS quite comical!

Apples FOR her:

* ask her out for a walk.   pick a fresh flower and give it to her.   you don't have to say anything.

* rub her feet, back, shoulders, and ask her about her day...not "so...what did you even do today?" or ask her about what she would like to different in her life in a year or five.  how can you help with that?

* ask if you can do dinner one of the nights this week.  let her plan on it and you plan on it...that way it isn't macaroni and cheese but it something she would really enjoy eating.

* call and check in.  text, email, send her a card, leave a love note where she'll find it after you've gone to work or after she gets to work.  when you say something nice, be specific.

* help her.  if what she needs isn't obvious to you, then ask.

Happy Spring!