inspire

I'm a mom.  Naturally, a lot of my insights come from my children.  This beauty below is Sarah.  She is not to be pushed.  If she has made up her mind at all, I can not force her to change it.

I can inspire her to change it though. (even then, it is up to her)

Have any of your kids ever said, "you're not the boss of me" or something to that affect?

 Has your spouse ever said that?  Maybe they have thought that!  We are really our own boss and that's it.  We should not make anyone do anything.  We can inspire them, but never force.  This is an art and something that does not come easy to me.

When it comes to marriage, we're a team.  We have goals, tasks, objectives, etc.
Have you ever thought, "I've asked them a million times to ____, why haven't they done it yet?"
In last weeks post, I talked about taking the time to plan.  I honestly believe that there will be less exasperated times with our spouse if we take the time to talk goals and make plans.

Are we only talking to our spouse about what needs to be done in the moment we need/want it done?  When we nag/boss/whine/{other annoying descriptive word}, we are not being a team player.  We are putting them down and acting as though we're above and they're below.

In our planning time we can talk about goals and make a plan to accomplish them.  It's "we time", not "me time".  If we approach things that way, it is constructive & healthy.

Apples for the week:

* schedule a time to plan & then plan:
  -a date night (who's in charge of finding the sitter & choosing the date?)
  -Temple night (which one?, sitter?)
  -yard work (what needs to be done?)
  -shopping (who is doing it, what do we need?)
  -misc. projects
  -date with kids
  -what are our financial goals? -even if you decide on an amount you want to have in the bank by a specific date, that is better than no goal at all. work together, don't point fingers.

* write them a note, that says more than "I love you", perhaps, why or how or when.
* tackle them, scare them, come up behind them & kiss their neck. (do something you know would make them smile)
* dance after dinner
* pray for them a lot
* call to encourage them, say thanks or tell them how you admire them for who they are & the kind of companion the are to you.

*be glad you're married!  it is SUCH a blessing!