How's your love bank looking right now?

have you noticed that you get easily irritated with your spouse?  or are date nights a thing of the past?  do you do nice things for them just to do it?  when was the last time you consciously spoke their love language?  do you laugh together?  do you enjoy their company?

if you are reading this on a bad day, i'm not writing this so you will think your marriage is doomed.  seriously.

there are times in every marriage when the love bank account gets low.  it happens for many, many reasons and we honestly, most of the time, don't mean for it to happen!  it just does.  it does because we let something or someone come before our marriage.  again, not intentional.

so, lets get intentional.  it's a new year.  it's a great time to assess honestly where we are and where we want to be down the road.  and really, there is no better time than now.

why do we want to make deposits in our spouses love bank accounts?  well, if we aren't making deposits, then when withdrawals happen, the easily frustrated happens, the snappy comments happen, the lack of desire for quality time happens and then it gets worse...

whatever your love bank account statement says, just make note.  if you are in the positive and still making deposits, keep depositing.  if you are in the negative, then make some deposits and build your account back up.

one thing that is super great to remember is that you are responsible for YOU.  you can't change anyone else's attitude or actions.  you can only control your own.  you can set a good example though.

what are some deposits we can all make in our love banks?

*say something nice to them (and be sincere)
*do something nice for them (and be sincere)
*talk nice to them all day (and be sincere) :)
*leave a note with words to your favorite love song or poem.
*ask them what they have going on that day and then later that day, text them and say you're thinking about them and you hope whatever they had went well or wish them good luck.
*pray for your spouse.
*pray together.
*when they are talking, listen to them by looking at their face and not your phone.
*touch them when you walk by.
*watch them and look for the good.
*start writing down what you're grateful for in them. (could be a great Valentines gift if you started soon)
*if you've been slacking at helping around the house, join in and be a team. turn on some music and enjoy yourselves.
*read about something that interests your spouse and shock them when YOU bring it up.
*ask them out on a date

remember, these are all like apples.  consider an apple a day, a good deed a day,  a deposit a day. whatever you want to call it.  abundant blessings await for being intentional in your marriage!

i've enjoyed writing this list.  while you read this list, what things came to your mind that would be like deposits in your spouses love bank?

it's good to be blogging again.
i love being married.
Becca

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THE APPLE FOR THE DAY IS: Plan a surprise visit to their work...can't visit at work? email a note to their co-worker and have them give it to them for you or put it on their car.

Have a great day!

Today

is Tuesday. It's looking good. cold. but good.

I think for my apple today I will write a few notes and put them about the house. Love notes and perhaps an invitation to a desert date and a game after the kids are snoozing.

What are you going to do?

note to self.

Note to self: if you have a child who can read, watch what you write on your bathroom mirror with dry erase marker.

Yeah, note to self. :)

just sayin'

There is something sweet about randomness. It is nice to get a card for occasions with expressions of love, but there is something more thoughtful when it comes at random.

If you are crafty, make cards for your spouse and keep them on hand. If you aren't, then make a habit of looking at the cards when you are at the store and buy them when they're on sale-or you can fold a piece of paper and that works too!

Today, make one and write your spouse a note. It doesn't have to be complicated. Just tell em' you appreciate them. If you want double points, send it in the mail! There's your apple!

good advice...:)

I think I took this picture before we went through customs in Ireland. Gotta love advice from the Irish. :)

There is the apple for the day! lol!

I obviously thought it was funny, that's why I took a picture of it.

The apple for the day for real is: write your spouse "the top ten reasons why you are lucky to be theirs!" OR "the top ten reasons why they are lucky to by yours!"

Sorry this was posted so late in the day! Even if you do it tomorrow it will still be fun!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!!

"Take Luck"!

Here are a couple apples for ya!

Use THIS if you'd like a pattern for a four leaf clover to cut out. The apple is: color it or print it on green paper, cut it out and write tons of notes on them! Put them wherever and whenever! Seriously.

Here's another apple: if you and/or your spouse love march madness then go HERE for a bracket. Print it out or fill one out online. Place bets, give rewards for whoever has the most teams make it out of each round. ie. the winner gets a back rub, foot rub, the laundry folded, car washed, or ice cream from their favorite place. If one or both of your teams make it to the final four you get lucky! These are just ideas. Do what you want!

Even if you don't follow the teams or love basketball, if your spouse does, then have fun with this!

Last apple: watch this with your spouse if you want a good laugh! (I posted this before but you know, it's called take luck! Besides I laugh every time!)

try really hard. :)

The apple for the day is: write notes! Hide them, post them around. Tell your spouse how awesome they are! There doesn't have to be a reason!

Have I mentioned I love conversation hearts?

this is why...

this is why this blog is good for me. i sit here at my computer wanting some inspiration. what can i do for Zach today? i'm in love with that man.

*wash our sheets?

*tidy our room?

*it's Tuesday, he isn't going to be home all day. sending him a love email would be nice.

I think that is a good list. what apples are you going to try?

Don't stop!

If your Valentines day was wonderful...then keep the ball rollin'! Keep leaving those notes around the house, sending sweet texts, emails and messages on Facebook! Give them a nice greeting when you get home. Keep using those conversation hearts until they run out and doing love hunts with your kids... and so on!

Now, if your Valentines day wasn't that great don't lose hope! :) You can always declare yourselves another one!

And if the ball never started rollin', then give it a push! Leave the sweet notes and messages and give them a good long hug and kiss when you see them next!

Sweet love isn't only for Valentines Day and no one ever said you can only have ONE APPLE A DAY! :)

Love Month Baby!

I love themes! I love them because they help me focus! I LOVE that this is love month!

No need to feel exhausted because love month sounds like too much! Just start cutting hearts!

Use them:

*to write notes

*extend an invitation for a date, talking time, treat time or any other "time" you want to share with your spouse.

*put them up around the house as decoration with things you love about your spouse written on them

*to leave in random places your spouse will find them with encouragement and love written on them. -put them under dinner plates, in lunches, the toilet lid, the bathroom wall.

What else could we use those hearts for? paper airplanes?

Happy first day of love month!

note to self

When I am trying to start a new habit I make notes to myself. Zach has given me notebook after notebook for my to write things in! -mostly because he has tried to get me to use just one notebook instead of 5 at a time! *sigh*

Anyway, back to apples!

The apple for the day is: if you think of something fabulous to do for your spouse write it down! Don't forget about it! Or if you are wanting to do better at something in your relationship write it down! Gosh, that really helps! And if you can't think of anything to do for them that you can write down...write them a note then! Tell them they are the coolest!

p.s. I don't think I need a super legit reason to put a picture of Zach on here. After all it is a marriage blog and I am married to him. the end. :)

cute. :)

so the other night I had a girls night with some new friends. I came home kind of late. Zach was in bed when I got home. I tiptoed about the house and didn't turn on many lights. I just loved that Zach left me a note and he left it on the toilet because he knew I would see it. :) the end.

so far, so good. :)

So, how are your new years resolutions coming?

I decided after the first full week of the year that I needed to be more specific with myself. I was trying to be vague as not to burden myself with a bazillion specific goals that I can't keep. -but I wasn't really doing anything I wanted to because I hadn't written it down and challenged myself to do it.

One of my goals was to be more grateful. The other one was I decided to write Zach a letter every week for the whole year.

I read this book called "The Wednesday Letters" a while back and the idea stuck with me. When this couple was married, the husband decided to write to his wife once a week while they were married. When they died these letters told their children stories they had never heard. Sweet book.

I enjoyed writing a letter to Zach and he enjoyed reading it.

Maybe committing to do something like that for a whole year is overwhelming to you. For the apple today I am going to recommend writing them a letter though. Just write to them like they were away, give them the gist on how things are going and give them encouragement if they need it. Leave it on the pillow, purse, bag or mail it.

salt preserves...

Salt is a great preservative! How about when you are putting salt/ice melt out on your walks you write "I LOVE YOU" with it! Let the salt help preserve your creative dating juices. :)

Try this for an apple and see if your spouse notices!

Spooky Spouse

It is Saturday. You are probably busy like I am doing Halloweenish things. While you are at it, leave some spooky sweet notes about.

Dear Zach,

I love your stinkin' guts

you make me vomit

you are the scum between my toes

Love,

Your Spooky Wife

name that movie :)

some of you are more creative than me. what are some "spooky" notes you can come up with?

I know, I know!

I know it's Monday. Sometimes Mondays are just crazy because we are trying to catch up from the weekend....and then some.

The Apple for the day is:

How about having some fun being a flirt with your spouse. Send them cute texts, when they come home give them an extra long kiss and a slap on the bum. :)

Okay, I'm not going to spell it out for you! Act like your are dating again & just have fun!

"An apple a day"

Take a dry erase marker to the bathroom mirror. Write a love note!